Hey, Uh, Kevin Costner, The Bug Lady's Here
Thursday, Jul. 31, 2003
I see a petite, cute gal zip into Princess Fluffy's office. I keep looking in that general direction, I suppose looking at the circuit breakers which grace my view. My other great view is out my window at the side of a storage shed.
The gal pops out of Fluffy's office and comes over to mine. She's an exterminator. A very young, cute exterminator, but really she should do something differnet with her hair than just pull it back. Also, makeup is your friend. Learn to use it wisely. Not all makeup is the same. Eyeshadow will not keep your forehead from shining like a Telly Savalis and hot bacon salad dressing.
[Note: For Savalis, MSWord suggests Avails, Somalis, Savagism, Safaris, and Cavallies. And if you search for Cavallies at www.m-w.com, it will suggest you search for Cavallies. And if you pick that to search for, it will suggest you search for Cavallies.]
She: Hi.
Me: Hey, uh.* Is that for rats?
She: No, it's for roaches.
Me: Eh, we don't have any food in here. [Look over at old Kimchi Bowl Noodle bowls stored in view.]
She: Well, better safe than sorry. You wouldn't want your office to be the only one with bugs.
Me (leaving with coffee cup): Well, a few roaches in my office would just add character.
I walk over to TC's office where he and Fluffy are talking.
Fluffy: I filed the taxed for my ex-husband's company all by myself.
Me: While he was your ex?
Fluffy: No, before.
[bug gal enters]
Bug Gal (to TC): I need you to sign this.
TC (signing): So, is that paste edible?
Bug Gal: Huh?
Fluffy: Oh, don't listen to him.
Me: Eh, just put a little bit in my coffee.
Bug Gal (retreating, not making eye contact): Well, thanks. [Exits]
Fluffy: She'll never be back again.
TC: Yeah, I told her I caught and ate rats.
Me: I told her that there was no food in my office when my Kimchi Bowl Noodle was in view.
Oh, and my memory of the conversation is wrong since I forgot to mention that I said something about the dragonfly that I caught, inside the building by the microwave, and let free outside. It added to the freakiness of the conversation, as I think TC said we never had any bugs, but I said, "Uh...I dunno, we did have that dragonfly this morning."
I think TC's thinking Kaufman type thoughts, or possibly Dave Chappelish, and I'm thinking Fear and Loathing.
Also, I would have put up an icon of a dragonfly, but I know Kevin Costner reads this (usually drunk) and dragonflies freak him out. Or so I've heard.
*I have got to stop saying, �Hey, uh.� I got that over 14 years ago when I was living among Canadians at UAH. I blame the hockey players upstairs, but mostly Roald Richard (Row-`ouwld Rih-`shard).