Oil Change Dog Goes Boom
8/30/2

Yesterday Aisai had to work a little late to help with The Underground Lair�s Secret Elbow Rubbing Party. After that, she had her accounting class so she�d get home around eight. I planned on changing the oil in the Schwartz Car and washing it.

I decided to hold off on putting more NuFinish on the car since I have Monday off and I might clay the thing. The paint doesn�t feel very smooth even though it gives a mirror finish. Well, it would if there wasn�t so much sap stuck to it. You can�t tell from over three feet away, but I am often closer that three feet to my car.

So, I get home and leave the Miata in the driveway with the tires turned all the way to the left. I get the jack and jack it up as high as it will go and put the jack stands under it. With it like that it looks like it hopped up in the air and did a little �Yay!� move.

I had stopped by Hel-Mart, again, to get an oil drain pan and a funnel. I�d forgotten both the other day. I have an oil drain pan, but it�s small and also full. I need some milk gallon jugs to recycle what�s in the little oil drain pan, and actually the stuff in the big one now too.

The magnetic oil pan plug I put in didn�t collect much. That�s good, but I was really expecting to see something. I hadn�t changed the oil without Aisai there and it was very difficult to get the oil filter off. It took a long time, but I finally found I needed to lie on the ground with the front tire on my chest and unscrew it with my left hand.

I don�t like getting under the car since a gal I hung out with in school�s dad got crushed to death by a car. But he wasn�t using jackstands. I put the car up and then shake the thing around. Better to fall without me under there.

Well, I�m doing all that and a dog comes up into the yard. He�s like a fat ugly mostly-collie guy. I�d not seen him before.

�Hey, there, Mr. Dog. What are you doin�?� I say to the dog. The dog�s not so sure about me talking to it so it starts walking away, out of my yard and into the street.

That�s when the car hit it.

It was a boom-yipe. The loudness of the boom, and the approximate sound, as I described to Aisai was if you had taken a 2x4 or a bat and had hit one of the cushions on our leather couch as hard as possible, that�s what it sounded like. The yipe was the yipe of a dog who got hurt.

I turned away. I actually shielded my eyes from the side and looked in the opposite direction. I know it sounds goofy, but it was my reaction to seeing a dog I�d just been talking to getting hit by a car. A old burgundy Corsica at that.

I hear the car starting to drive away and look back over, expecting to see exploded dog, but there was no dog.

The car left. I walked over to the street in front of Kurt�s house (as that�s where the car and dog ended up) and looked at the pavement. No blood. A skid mark, sure, but no evidence of the dog.

That�s pretty much the end of the story too. The dog must have left. I did see the burgundy Corsica leaving the subdivision while I was washing the car after my oil change. The guy driving had a guilty look as he stared back at me staring at him.

�Yeah, buddy. I know you popped that dog.�

For those who care, I switched the car back to 15w-50 and can actually tell a difference with the smoothness of the engine. I noticed that it looks like the valve cover has a slight leak near the #4 cylinder. No biggie, but if I change the gasket I can paint the valve cover.

I was thinking gloss white Castle engine paint.

I got emails saying that both my niece�s birthday gift and my nephew�s birthday gift had been shipped. Now, either FedEx has the most irritatingly simplistic tracking info available, or K-mart is actually FedExing his gift from the store in Madison to my house, also in Madison.

Oh, and I went to the doctor yesterday. I have sinusitis, or a sinus infection, and fatigue.

Well, I could have told you the fatigue part.

My antibiotics were $117.