Dear Clueless in Googletown,
6/2/2

Well, Zo� put in her entry for today what she�s been getting hits for from Google. I tell ya, it�s a bad idea.

Sure, it�s a good way to get hits, but the hits you get aren�t the hits that the people want. By reinforcing the hits that seem odd, you throw even more people off. But, alas, I�m gonna do the same thing, but hopefully I�ll give that little bit o� info that helps a tiny bird heal it�s broken wings.

Sorry, I got all Hallmark there for a moment. [As baby bunnies awake and gently rub their eyes�]

Someone searched for �paint a blues clues bedroom� at Yahoo, and then clicked on my link which showed up in 19th place, titled �Stuffo: Armored Pimp Boots�. Ok, if you got to this page on that same search, take a hint from the Pimp Boots, baby, you�re in the wrong place.

The perennial �Let The Bodies Hit The Floor� is probably my number one hit. I�m getting the same effect off this as when I put the lyrics to Jungle Love [O E O E O] up. By the way, that song is by Drowning Pool. If you don�t have Kazaa, then go to CDnow and buy it. I tell ya, I get more hits for this than all the rest combined.

�TV Cable Tester�?

�GTA3 Hidden Package Maps�? The best ones I�ve seen were in the Official Playstation Magazine for the month of April 2002 with Johnny Virtua Fighter on the front. They should have put that hot gal they put in the TV ads. But for fighting games on PS2, I�m all about the Dead or Alive 2. Oh, and I highly recommend getting all the packages in Portland before you kill Salvatore.

�Battlebots Season 5�? Well, actually they started filming the competition on Treasure Island in San Francisco just this last week [or was it two weeks ago] for season four, so don�t hold your breath.

�+miata +�check engine��? I highly recommend you flit over to Miata.net and ask about that in the forum. The guys over there are extremely nice and you never know, you may just get a housecall if there�s one nearby.

�best car to pimp out�? May I suggest the 1973 Riviera? Arguably, the 1990 Crown Victoria would make an odd statement, especially if you kept the exterior black. Again, it was the Armored Pimp Boots entry. Who would have thunk my pimp boots [which really aren�t that pimpy, G] would be so popular?

�kia rio reliability�? I dunno, buddy, but I�d hold off. In fact, thinkin� Rio�go buy a Ford Festiva. It�s the same car, lighter, and has an enthusiast following on the internet. I really like the Rio, as it is a real Kia and not a stinkin� Hyundai like the other models in the Kia line. Sure, I would say don�t buy Korean car, but I actually like the true Kia cars. The hit they got was �The Perfect Car Under 5 Grand�, which coincidentally Aisai�s co-worker completely ignored and bought a Kia Sephia which is falling apart and has no resale value. Oh, yes, your Rio will be upside down for the life of the loan.

�Ikea Flooring�? Actually, now we�re leaning toward the Cirrus Blue Armstrong Commercial Flooring. Mainly since the nearest Ikea is in Chicago [or Philly, but�ewww, Philly] and I think the shipping would kill the economy. That said, Aisai�s sister has put it into two houses. There is also an episode of Trading Spaces where they put it in. It�s on a layer of thin foam and locks without adhesives. You guessed it, they hit the Pimp Boot page too. Freaks.

�Did Greg the Bunny get cancelled?� Yes. Unfortunately they clicked in on �Weekend: Pre-Car-Falling-Apart� where their answer was really in the �When George Lucas says, "I'm Your Father," I say, "Nooooooooo!"� entry.

�freon miata�? Again, go www.miata.net.

�kia death�? Or, should I say KIA. Killed in action. Sorry, can�t help you.

�Miata shaved head�? Hey, sounds like a plan!