Again With The Triglycerides?
3/26/2
I got a call from the doctor. My MRI was normal. And what I thought was the problem, sure enough, was the problem.
It was my triglycerides. Which I hope I�m spelling right since Microsoft Word doesn�t seem to know that word.
My cholesterol was 221. The good cholesterol was 39.4 or something, but the bad cholesterol couldn�t be calculated since my triglycerides were above 200.
What I�ve been told, and I can�t quote a source, is that if your triglycerides are above 150 the chance of you having a heart attack is quadrupled.
My triglycerides were 647.
However, that said, it�s just not accurate. Basically, the machine displayed that number, but the nurse told me that really that is off the scale and the number isn�t accurate anymore.
So, how did I get my triglycerides down last time?
Let�s recall the conversation I had �back in the day�...
[woodle woodle dream sequence squigglies]
Me: So, what do I need to eat or stop eating to get my triglycerides down?
Nurse-Of-The-Past: It doesn�t work that way.
Me: Ooh.
NOTP: You�re going to have to start exercising.
Me: Nooooooooooooooo!
[woodle woodle back to the present]
It didn�t really go exactly like that, I didn�t go �Noooooooooooooo!� or anything. In fact, because I have some sporty clothing, the consumer culture has led me to believe that I have an active lifestyle. I�m sure I�d feel like I had an even more active one if I owned a sport utility vehicle. That�s SPORT utility, see, sporty.
Well, I think I still have the PDF of the stretches and exercise program from the Navy�s OCS thing. The simplest way to get in shape I�ve ever seen is the recommended training for lil� snot nosed officer candidates to do before they show up at OCS.
I have toyed with the idea of becoming a COC in the Navy. In fact, since I�m a CHE they�ll still take me. All these acronyms are confusing the proletariat.
Eschew Obfuscation, I say.
Actually, the filthy proles are trying to get a good buzz on under the overpasses right now. Fortunately, Huntsville seems to have a better class of wino/hobo since most tend to not actually be homeless professionally and they don�t do that gold spray paint thing.
Spray paint drunks...there�s nothin� worse.
And thus, this entry has degenerated into me freeform bashing the cheap intoxicant demographic. Not that they�ll ever see this.
I can just imagine some guy sitting at home, reading my website off his computer while �huffing� a wadded up sock sprayed with gold spray paint.
And you know there�s not adequate lighting in the room.