Dreams that Freak the Freudians
11/28/1

Nowadays, when I go to sleep, the male cricket is always making a racket. Sure, he�s a full 35 feet away from my bed, and in a china cabinet, and in a terrarium inside that china cabinet, but he�s awful loud.

I�m not sure it affects my dreams, but last night I did, in fact, dream and I remember some of it.

First, not quite a dream, I woke suddenly and I felt like I was lying in my bed back in the house that my parents owned when I was in high school. 745 Bluewood. I was upstairs in my room. It really felt that way. The shadows in the room even looked like it. The light coming in from the streetlight in the bathroom window made the bathroom wall seem like my dormer window at Bluewood. It just felt exactly right.

I moved my head and got confused since I was actually in my master bedroom in my own house. Yes, telemarketers, I am a homeowner. Then I went back to sleep.

At one point, I dreamed that Willow Rosenberg, not Allyson Hannigan but Willow, was talking with us. I don�t remember who us was or what the setting was, but I remember that Willow had on a shirt that was not sufficiently opaque for her braless state. I was trying to be conversational without staring.

The Freudians in the audience are raising eyebrows at me, huh?

Another part was my sleeping in the center turn lane of a street. I had a blanket, and I actually remember it was light blue, and really the asphalt wasn�t really scratchy, like asphalt really is, but it was nice and firm. I think my mattress is too soft even though it�s some Uberfirm thing. I almost got run over, but you could see that part coming. I ran off the right side of the road and I�m not sure I had clothes on at that time, but I think I had something on while I was in the street. It was really sunny.

So, I�m sure the Freudians are all over that one too. How�s this for freakin� the Freuds:

I dreamed that I was at the Washington Monument and I was naked. The candle I was carrying had gone out and I had a Big Gulp [a 44 oz drink of the 7-11 persuasion] but it was empty. Oh, and Willow Rosenberg from Buffy the Vampire Slayer was wearing a see-through shirt.

Yikes.

Actually, the Freudians would be more critical that my car has a hp/lb ratio of 0.054, or perhaps, that I know the ratio.