My name is Ookla. I am a Mok.
6/8/1
I�m feeling like a barbarian today. My brain is unsettled about something.
I told Aisai that I couldn�t remember my dreams this morning, but now I do. I was hanging out with a wolf and some dude was cooking. The wolf was fine as long as I didn�t show any fear and just pushed him around some. I�m not saying that I was mean or beating him up or anything, just that push away or push down that is needed to instruct dogs about what the subtleties of how to act around you are.
Yesterday, I wore my glasses to work. I do that when I�m planning on taking a nap in the afternoon. I didn�t get my nap since I played Gran Turismo 2. I�m going to be a zombie when Gran Turismo 3 comes out.
I didn�t have any tapes in the car so I had to listen to the radio. Most of the stations that we have do the morning show thing. The one station that they will just shut up and play some music is the oldies station. I skipped around some, but also caught a catchy Dionne Warwick song.
I was out of coffee grounds, so I stole some from the office coffee pot. Oh, yes. Did I not mention that? Everyone else gets coffee from the office coffee pot but I have my own in my office. Back in the old days [Note: I didn�t go stupid on you and say �Back in the day�], there was a coffee kitty. Seeing that I didn�t want to be a coffee pirate, and I wasn�t going to pay $5 a month to be in the sucky coffee club, I brought my own coffee maker. Besides, their coffee maker used to brew the coffee at too low a temperature and it didn�t get the good flavors out. The coffee came out flat.
I said to The Director, �I stole some coffee from you guys. Man, if I�m going to steal from you, you really have to buy better stuff.� They get a big can of generic coffee at the PX on the arsenal. And when I say generic, I don�t mean Great Value brand. It�s a can with a white label with the word Ground Coffee on the front. I hadn�t seen stuff like that since the great generic craze of around 1980.
I had to go out into the plant. I wore my hardhat to protect me from the rain. We have a new hardhat policy which is very comprehensive. I think they could have just said, �Prior to any head injury, a hard hat must be worn.� That would make just as much sense and, if followed, would cut down on accidents. I have a post-it note from T-boss saying, �You do not need to attend safety meetings. Thanks anyway.� I need to frame that. He has since cursed the day he wrote that. Bwah ha ha ha.
I�ve been baiting for hits and also for Google search collectors lately. It is no secret that when a person does an entry which notes what they are getting hits for, it reinforces the hitness of their place on that topic. Another way I bait for hits is by hitting the Random button at the bottom of the page, in the Diaryland ring thing. It zaps me to another page. If they check their traffic, then they see that a referring page was my page and they visit to see what it is. Small potatoes as far as hits goes, but it get them in the door.
Now, the baiting for Google hit collectors is something different. I look at my referring pages and find interesting search terms to be funny. So yesterday, just to feed the searchiness people, I searched at Google for �Don�t Forget Your Giant Ass, Diaryland� and hit on some pages. Now, if I�m lucky, these people will submit it to Oddgoogle and it will show up. My bait, intentionally designed to show up, bwah ha ha ha. I�m the fly in the ointment. Har har har.
On the way home, I had to go by the ATM. The ATM at Bruno�s that I go to will beep when it spits out your money. �The money is in the open. The money is in the open.� it screams to all passers by. Why did they put this feature in? If anyone is so dim that they might forget that their hard earned cash is sitting in a little bin in front of them�
So, I go to the cigar shop on the way home and nab some cigars. When the young dude is talking to me, he suggests one of the St. Cristobal (or something like that) cigars that are also on sale. I tell him that I�d gotten one, but really didn�t like it. It was harsh and smokey and, generally, crap. He said I must have just gotten a bad one, which he�d not heard of. He said, �Take another one and see how you like it.�
�I�m not getting another of those. They suck. I�ll stick to the Don Fano and other cheap cigars that I know are good.�
He then told me that he was giving it to me. Take one. No charge.
I got five cigars for under $5. I got another Don Fano, one of those dark Mexican ones, one of those with the embarrassingly bad rings designs, and Indigo second, and�Oh, the St. C-Whatever.
I got both a Car and Driver and my Teddy Roosevelt book The Strenuous Life, in the mail. The book is in much better condition than I thought it would be. It�s a 1901 printing and has been in a library.
I sat on the font porch and smoked the St. C-whatever cigar and listened to Garage Cage Dog and read my Car and Driver. Garage Cage Dog is worse off than Chain Dog. GCD used to be tethered in his back yard by a nylon rope. Essentially, he was a chain dog, but with a rope. He would chew through it, but not have the sense to leave his family completely for doing that to him. They would re-tether him and he�d sit in the hot Alabama sun, or the cold Alabama winter, or the never ending Alabama spring rains. But he would chew through it.
One of the sure signs of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.
They finally caught on, but their solution is more hideous. They keep him in a cage in a closed garage all day. It makes me almost cry to think about that.
That is the way Chaindog I died. They put him in the garage in a cage. Then, miraculously, Chaindog became less than a year old and was in the back yard again. It doesn�t take a genius to figure out that on one of our 110 heat index days, Chaindog I died.
Wow, and this was supposed to be a funny Stuffo.
Last night, like it seems all Diaryland people tend to document, We went to Wal-Mart. I was planning on going to McD�s this morning and getting a 99 cent breakfast burrito, but I had some of my new cereal instead.
I had to turn around in my car once I realized that I had forgotten my coffee. I can�t drink that econo-swill again.
What other kinds of swill are there?