Let's Take It Down A Notch. BAM!
5/18/1
I�m feeling like the anti-Emeril today. Oddly, even before I went to bed last night, I said to my wife, �Let�s take it down a notch. BAM.� Ho ho, hee hee. I need a vacation.
So, what the hoodly-doo am I talking about?
My alarm didn�t go off today, because I forgot to set it last night.
I woke up very hungry because I threw up the McDonald�s I ate last night.
I usually leave the house at 6:20 am, but today I left at 6:25 since I woke up at 6:18. The benefits of having your head shaved were manifesting themselves today.
So, here is how this morning went:
I awaken enough to know that it�s too light outside. I look at my watch and it�s 6:18. I make some noise to Aisai about the alarm and hop out of bed. I wash my face and spray a lot of deodorant on. I ask Aisai to get me some socks since they are still in the dryer and I�m trying to rush. I turn around and step in cat pee.
Zapato is having another urinary tract infection and I forgot to give her medicine last night and the night before. Last night wasn�t too pleasant either, but I can only blame myself.
When Aisai got home from work, we decided that we�d just eat out before we picked up the lumber for The Structure in the backyard we are building. We watched the beginning of World�s Best Places To See Big Groups of Animals Swarming and then went out. We didn�t know which place we were going to but we went out Highway 72 since that is where the Lowe�s is. It came down to a decision to go to either McDonald�s or Hardee�s. Aisai chose McDonald�s.
I got a rather nasty Philly Cheese n� Crap Combo. I had one of these sandwiches earlier in the year and it was much better. Maybe it was the lack of mayo and the addition of mushrooms that nastied it all up. I didn�t enjoy it much.
Then we got lumber and after we unloaded it into the backyard, I had a cigar.
It must be noted that you can get ten-foot boards into a 1987 Camry Wagon. The first two would actually fit without having to leave the hatch open. But since we picked up three 4x4 posts, four 5/6x6 boards, both ten feet long, and a 112-inch long 2x4, the hatch had to be tied down. The boards were going diagonally from the rear left corner of the car up to the right side of the dash, majorly cutting into Aisai�s personal space. But it was her job to keep them from sliding.
The cigar was allegedly one of the finest cigars I�ve had. It was a Punch Royal Coronation, or something like that. I�m jaded toward it since I barfed up poorly chewed fries afterward. But, knowing that is was a really good quality cigar; I over smoked it a little. I usually sit and read and the thing might go out. This one did go out when I was talking to a neighbor about his garden at one point.
But about 20 minutes after I finished the cigar, I got sick.
I don�t get nauseous like my wife does. She gets all sick and is flat out useless. I just get an odd dizzy type feeling and know it�s going to happen.
Since I knew I�d be visiting my porcelain pal, I decided to clean it up first. I sprayed Scrubbing Bubbles on it and wiped them off. I also put a towel on the floor for me to sit on. I sat there for a while then Barfoon!
It hurt more than I remember and I stupidly used my vocal cords when I was vomiting. Don�t do this kids, it�s not good for you.
Afterward I watched Tenchi and that Swarm documentary, then Angel where they killed the nightclub host demon, and went to bed.
And then there was this morning.
Aisai cleaned up the cat pee and I got dressed. I hit the road very tired and I grabbed three flour tortillas to eat in the car. I only ate two.
As I came over the Martin Road exit overpass, there he was. A German shepherd was trotting up the exit ramp. I passed him, pulled over, and got out. The Mercedes behind me slowed to a stop, I guess feeling he was protecting the dog. The Vega-ish type car almost slid into the Mercedes and from then on the place smelled like burnt rubber.
�C�mere, Buddy.� I called to the dog and clapped my hands in front of my knees. He ran from me. I assumed that his being from the south this would have been the right thing to say to him.
If I knew he was going to run from me, I would have pulled over in front of him rather than behind him. That way he would have gone down the exit and would be back on solid ground. Actually, my car would have been rear-ended. This is the same place that the squirrel was standing on the overpass.
I got back in the car and came into work. I called 911 and told them the dog was making a mess of traffic.
When I got in, a co-worker said that a Doberman was running around, dodging cars on the parkway. It wasn�t a Doberman. It was the same dog.
Three hours later: T-Boss just got in and I asked it there was a dead dog on the parkway. He said no, but that there was a dead bobcat on the road in. I�ll get to see that when I go to Aisai�s work to pick up my wallet that I forgot this morning.
Maybe it was a Belgian Shepherd.
And I liked the Onyx No. 650 Second I had the other day better.